After learning that I grew up in Australia stranger #2,578 asks,”how come you don’t have an accent?” Gee, I don’t know. How come you don’t have a tail? Oh thats right – we evolve!
I landed bleary eyed and starving at LAX airport early afternoon on August 20th, 1998. I was nineteen, 30lbs lighter and naturally blonde. I had left a loving mother, an okay job as a second chef, all of my college and high school friends for….for the unknown. And yes, I had an accent. A west oz accent that sounds best when excited as the vowels and exclamations merge together to form some kind of wonderful nonsense.
Flash forward 10 years. Now blonde thanks to $200 trips to the salon. Fatter thanks to a love for cheese, wine and everything fried. Accent emerges only when in the presence of fellow Australians or when extremely drunk or extremely nervous. All three rare situations.
Despite the often asked question I never fail to be suprised that folks think I SHOULD still have an accent. What will happen ten years from now when I will have lived in California just as long as I lived in Australia? Am I a disgrace to my people? Or just more adept at adapting to my surroundings. Does my love of vegemite mean nothing? Go ahead – dip your tail in it 
